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Gratitude Challenge – Day 5

Take five minutes to write about how grateful you are for all of the wonderful things that you currently have in your life. Don’t long for what you don’T possess—instead, take stock of all the blessings you already enjoy.

Wonderful things I currently have in my life:

  • a nice phone
  • a nice laptop
  • a comfortable home
  • a couple of nice TVs
  • time
  • internet
  • multiple game systems
  • and lots of games to play
  • youtube
  • smoke

It’s nice to have a job that allows me the freedom to purchase the toys I love. I’m very privileged.


  • a healthy relationship with my mother
  • a few sisters and brothers who love me
  • nieces and nephews who love me
  • a loving grandfather
  • a person
  • a bestie
  • a friend
  • a knitta friend

I spend a lot of time talking about how love is missing from my life. It’s silly, really. I’m surrounded by love. Romantic love isn’t the only kind of love out there.


  • talented hands that can make things
  • a pretty singing voice
  • great storytelling skills
  • a lovely history
  • a career I can be proud of

I’m creative, crafty, and talented.


  • a successful marriage, if a short one

My marriage did not fail, it ended. We loved each other hard and well. We chose to end it before it failed. I have nothing but love and respect for my ex.


  • peace
  • food
  • coffee
  • cheese
  • I just got a call from my sister
  • and I just ran out of time

You guys…

I just found this hidden in my YouTube vault. It’s soooooo cheesy. But it was made 8 years ago so give me a break.

( cool points if you started singing in your best Nell Carter voice. Demerits if you don’t know who Nell Carter is.)

It’s been at least 5 years since I’ve watched this. I am happy to say that it no longer causes me any pain. I can look back at this and smile for all the love shared.

It’s nice to have peace.

Laugh and reminisce with me!

Gratitude Challenge – Day 4

Is heartbreak a negative thing?

My heart breaks every day. Sometimes it breaks because of disappointment. Sometimes it’s because of an empathetic connection to another’s pain. Sometimes it’s a story or a song. Whatever the cause, my heart breaks on the regular.

That’s why I’ve become a bit guarded, to put it lightly. I’m sensitive, so I have a hard time opening up to people. I don’t let folks in easily. It’s hard for me to trust.

That’s everybody, right?

Not exactly. My best Gal Pal isn’t really like that. She’s been hurt so often in life, and yet her spirit is so open. Her heart is so full of love and her life reflects that. She’s lowkey my role model. In my fantasies, I can dance and spin through life with her ease and determination.

But in my reality, I’m just plain ol’ me. I’m mostly head, with a whole lot of heart. Heart that doesn’t get a whole lot of nurturing attention. Heart that doesn’t work very well.

Or, it works, I’m just not really sure how. Or why.

I am sure that I am not brave. I try so hard to avoid heartbreak that I end up existing in a sort of self-inflicted perpetual heartbreak. That’s what I know.

How can I be grateful for that?

I am currently experiencing a different kind of heartbreak. I allowed myself to be a bit less guarded, for a small period of time and it paid off. Only now, I’m heartbroken. This new kind of heartbreak is more pointed than the usual daily aches.

This heartbreak has totally wrecked me.

Everytime I allow myself to feel it, my whole body flushes, my stomach drops, and my eyes well up with tears. This heartbreak is one that I haven’t felt for a long time.

This particular heartbreak is a reminder of everything I have to gain by choosing to be brave. It’s glorious. I feel alive.

And I can certainly be grateful for that.

Gratitude Challenge – Day 1

Today I am starting a 21 Day Gratitude Challenge. Each day, for the next three weeks, I am challenged to express gratitude for the things in my life.

I accepted this challenge because I have been struggling with a pretty severe bout of depression. I’ve been experiencing anxiety, fear, shame. I’ve started hiding again, which is really hard to handle because I have really been enjoying putting myself out there and being social.

Doing this challenge is a way for me to take stock of the good things in my life; a chance to remind myself of all the beauty that surrounds me.

This is an opportunity for me to find love where I feel that there is none.

So today, I am grateful for opportunity.

I’m going to end this here, before I start singing Tomorrow from Annie.

I found THIS 21 day Gratitude Challenge on the Passion Planner Blog.

Laundry Day

Soft, yellow cotton. The blanket hung from the clothes line, swaying in the warm summer breeze. The tiny girl was at her feet, cushioned on soft blades of grass, arms outstretched, seeking to wrap berry stained hands around sun drenched cotton.

“No, baby girl,” she gently scolded, “not until Mama gives you a bath.” The tiny girl gave her a sleepy pout. She smiled. “Did your Daddy teach you that?” Mama placed the little one on her hip. She smelled like sunshine.

Baby girl gripped Mama’s smiling face with sticky fingers. Their laughter floated through the neighborhood; special, sacred, sweet.

The Office Furniture/Art Gallery Emporium

She closed her eyes and imagined what wonders awaited her there. Fabric rolling chairs that smelled of stale coffee.

Ink stains.

Metal filing cabinets.
Burnt plywood landscapes.
Found object figurines.

Credenzas.

The absurdity of the moment made her giddy. A golden flower bloomed in her core and filled her with a warm, glowing light.

A light that flickered. Like street lamps with commitment issues.

With eyes wide, she ignored the signs of broken pipes and air that smelled of forgotten words captured on mildewed pages moist with time.

One spore was all it took. She stepped forward.

Unaware that adaptation had begun.